As-salamu `alaykum, brother.
Thank you for your important question, which raises an issue that a lot of parents in the West inevitably face. Before we answer the question, let us think together on some of the things we want a school to provide for our children:
- A good education
- A safe playing environment
- Respect for individuality and capability
- A chance to develop potential
- A place to interact with other children
- A place which fosters good character
- A place which fosters a child's beliefs
All parents have slightly different expectations or priorities with regards to choosing the right school for their children, for it is a fact that school is a major factor in determining much of a child’s thinking and view of life.
I suggest, brother, that you sit down with your wife and write down what you require from a school and the priorities of such requirements. Pay visits to both schools; look around them and talk to the teachers. Make istikhara prayer (supplication for guidance in making a decision) and go ahead and choose the school you believe meets your requirements most.
Many Muslims tend to choose Islamic schools because they believe such schools will help their children in their belief as Muslims. Other parents may have different sources for strengthening Muslim beliefs in their children, such as enrolling in weekend Arabic schools. Some parents have children with tendencies towards the Western lifestyle and beliefs, so parents feel it is safer and better for their children to be in an Islamic environment most of the day, in order to safeguard their `aqeedah (beliefs). Other parents feel that they would like to enroll their children for a few years in multicultural schools, and then move them on to Islamic ones when the children are approaching puberty. As you can see, each family has its unique factors and priority of requirements.
We wish you the very best in your decision-making process, brother, for it is Allah’s pleasure that you are seeking, and your confusion only stems from your great feeling of responsibility towards those children that Allah Most High has granted you. He will ask you about the measures you have taken to bring them up to be Muslims who are a pride to Islam in this life, as well as a shelter for you from Hellfire in the Afterlife.
For further guidance, try the following links:
Ready, Set, Go… Back to School
Our Kids and Building Self-Confidence
Islamic Education for Teachers and Parents in the West
Maintaining an Islamic Identity in the Western School System
Jazaka Allahu khayran