The session has started. You can now join us with questions.
Name
ihsan
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Profession
Question
Can you please define what you mean by psychological benefits? And how does fasting achieve these benefits?
Answer
Everything we experience in life has an effect on our thinking, emotions, and ultimately our behaviour. Similarly, the act of fasting has significant effects on our thinking, emotions, and behaviour. This is what is meant by the psychological effects of fasting.
Going hungry, thirsty, and indulging into other rituals of fasting such as taraweeh, waking up for suhur, and iftar (breaking the fast) – all these acts affect how we think, behave, and feel. For example, just the routine of it all brings a certain discipline in our life that lots of us may not have had before.
Name
farah
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Profession
Question
How can we solve family problems around the table of iftar?
Answer
Often unlike regular days families try to break their fast and eat their meal together in the holy month of Ramadan. This in itself provides an opportunity for the family to be together at a happy occasion of breaking their fast for a whole month.
Also, because everybody is hungry and thirsty there is less preoccupations with other problems at that time, and as well negative emotions such as anger, hurt, etc. are under control. All of this provides an opportunity for the family members to build and strengthen their relationships.
Name
shauqi
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Profession
Question
If you really believe fasting can solve psychological problems, how can someone who feels disappointed and has a lot of complications take fasting as a solution?
Answer
The holy month of Ramadan and fasting in this month has a potential to be helpful in resolving many psychological problems. But, if the problems are long lasting and complicated, a person may need additional help. Seeking such help in this holy month often proves more beneficial than in other months, that is, if the client and the therapist both practice the adaab (ethics) of fasting.
If you had mentioned a specific problem, I may have given specific way of dealing with that problem during this month.
Name
Aseel
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Profession
Question
Dr. Sadiq I am a very nervous person with high blood pressure, and I can easily get mad even when I am fasting. I sometimes find myself fighting over little things and then regret after I discover their being so trivial. What is your advice to me in Ramadan?
Answer
Dear sister,
If part of your anger problem emerges from high blood pressure, then it should be treated medically so that at least the high blood pressure is ruled out from the picture.
Now then, you said that you get angry on trivial things even in the month of Ramadan. Do you notice any decrease in losing your temper while you're fasting? (I assume you're fasting everyday.)
Generally, a person with a full stomach is more prone to anger outbursts, so while one is fasting, there generally isn't the same amount of physical energy to get angry or to be angry with high intensity.
The purpose of fasting that Allah Almighty has mentioned in the Holy Qur'an is "so that you would become restrained." Other translations for the word "restrained" are: god-fearing, mindful of your deeds, recognizing your accountability before Allah Almighty for all your deeds.
Keep the above in mind and often recite verse no. 183 in Surat Al-Baqarah, pondering on its meaning; and self-reflect while you're fasting if you're indeed becoming self-restrained, god-fearing, and mindful of your accountability before Allah the Almighty.
Close your eyes and imagine yourself standing in the court of Allah the Exalted and think: are you ready to account for your unjust anger at others?
Try this for the rest of the holy month, and insha'Allah you will notice a difference.
Name
sister in Islam
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Profession
Question
How can fasting and Ramadan functions solve disputes between two couples who really love each other but in so many times they fight and get separated?
Answer
First, please read the answer to the question of sister Aseel.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) teaches us that the holy month of Ramadan is the month showing kindness, being consolatory, and sharing the pains and joys of others. Therefore, when one understands and practices these teachings of the holy Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) in this holy month, it becomes easy to resolve the differences in the relationships.
Secondly, due to the special blessings of this month, our hearts are softened and generally people find it difficult to be mean to others while fasting.
As I mentioned in the answer sent by brother Shauqi, if the problems are long lasting and complex you may require professional help to assist you resolve these marital differences.
Name
Mo'min
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Profession
Question
How can a Muslim enjoy the happiness in Ramadan while the whole situation of Muslims in the world is very bad and does not make one feel happy. I can hardly have iftar when I watch the news in Palestine and Chechnya. How can one strike a balance between feeling sad and happy while fasting?
Answer
Dear brother,
I can truly feel the sadness and hurt in your question about the current situation of Muslim Ummah around the world. The way we reconcile between feeling sad about that and feeling happy for the blessings of Allah in the holy month of fasting is by acknowledging our individual weaknesses and the Might and Power of the Almighty. It is true that you and I and others individually cannot make a major difference on the situation of Muslim Ummah, but Allah the Almighty indeed has the power to change it in wink of an eye.
The holy month, and especially during the time of iftar and suhur, promises us acceptance of our du`a's (supplications). In one narration it is mentioned that during the twenty four hours of each day, one du`a' is accepted by Allah the Almighty from each of His servants. Now, if we use our precious time during this month in making du`a' for the Muslim Ummah, at least we have in some way done our part in bringing a change in the condition of the Ummah.
Secondly, understand that the Muslim Ummah is made up of individual people. If individuals make up their minds, especially in this holy month, to change their own condition and become God-fearing and accountable for their deeds and pray to Allah the Almighty for help and guidance in changing them, the whole Ummah and its conditions will change, insha'Allah.
Remember what Allah the Almighty says in the Holy Book, "Allah does not change the condition of a people until they change their own lives." (Ar-Ra`d: 11)
This holy month provides an excellent opportunity for all of us to begin this process of change. I pray to Allah to help us do this.
Name
please help
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Profession
Question
I am a teenager who is suffering from sex pressure especially when I go to school. Sometimes I feel my fasting does not count. What do you advise me to do?
Answer
As I have mentioned a number of times already, fasting is prescribed so that we can become restrained and God-fearing. Both these words imply that we are going to try our best to live our lives according to the commands of Allah the Almighty. One of these commands is to keep your gaze down and not look at strange women. The solution to your problem, therefore, is to lower your gaze while you're at school and at the same time keep reciting istighfar and praying to Almighty Allah to help you and protect you from the evils of the society.
We are taught by the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) that if one fasts and at the same time lies to people, Allah the Almighty does not require our hunger and thirst to please Him. The same principle applies to all transgressions.
Technically, according to my knowledge of the opinion of fuqaha' (scholars), your fast is still valid when you gaze at young girls and as a result suffer from sexual thoughts. However, you do not get the benefits and the spiritual rewards for your fasting.
Hope this helps!
Name
Norwan
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Profession
Question
My kids don't like the masjid and they love to go for other places. I find it very difficult to take them to the masjid in Ramadan to pray taraweeh and have iftar. I sometimes prefer to stay home with them so that they don't go to other places. Can you please suggest certain steps I can use with them to make them feel excited to going to the mosque. The age of my children are between 10 and 13.
Answer
The problem you have mentioned is unfortunately very common among Muslim families with teenagers. Here is how you can attempt to handle it:
1. Insha'Allah, starting next year in the month of Sha`baan, make it a ritual in your family to prepare for the coming of the holy month of Ramadan. There are many hadiths in which we find the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and the Companions (may Allah be pleased with them all) taking special steps to prepare for the holy month. Some ways you can do this is by reading those hadiths in the family gatherings to emphasize the importance of this month and the prescribed and recommended things that one should do in this holy month. Among them of course are: making special efforts to pray five times and taraweeh prayer in congregation.
2. Be an example, as parents, of these recommended deeds for your children. If you as parents go to the masjid only when convenient to you, then you teach your children that going to the masjid for congregational prayers is a secondary thing.
3. Given the age of your children, you are still in a position to lay out some fundamental rules and expectations in this regard. When children have clear expectations from their parents, they are more willing and try to abide by them. For example, if you said to them, 'going anywhere else but to the masjid at the time of prayers (at least some prayers) is not accepted in this house.' And if both you and your wife both follow through on it, you would notice a change in their behaviour insha'Allah.
4. During all the important times of this month, pray to Allah the Almighty to make your children steadfast in prayers.
Hope this helps!
Name
Editor
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Profession
Answer
Dear brothers and sisters,
We would like to apologize for not having the chance to answer all your questions. Please join us in coming live dialogue sessions.
