From your own point of view, how the European culture imposes itself on the kind of problems that emerge after the marriage?
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
The European culture imposes itself on problems emerging from marriage only when we do not understand the Islamic methodology of marriage. Islam has set certain rules for forming a family. It should be formed on harmony, tranquility, peace and love. Family should be run on the basis of consultation.
If we miss one of these foundations, without doubt, there will be problems. These problems might be caused by the husband or the wife or both of them. However, Islam provides solutions to all these problems. If we cannot understand these solutions then we will look for others and they will prevail. There no doubt that the spouse's perception of each other in Islam is different to that in the western culture.
Name
S.
- United Kingdom
Profession
Question
Salam Alaikum.
Is it allowed for me to ask for my mahr that I have the final say in what our future childrens names will be, if we cannot agree on a name?
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
There is no doubt that Mahr is the wife's exclusive right. A Mahr agreed upon by both spouses should be fulfilled.
Name
Cerebrosus
-
Profession
Question
Thanks for your being here answering our questions. Do u believe that the current European marital laws provide enough legislation to protect Muslim families in Europe?
My second question is, What do you do to encourage Muslim youth to get married instead of the out-of-marriage relationships ?
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
I think the current European marital laws can protest the material rights but not the abstract rights and the educational aspects since they are based on what is called fifty fifty and not the mercy and self-denial.
Islam call upon protecting religion, life, mind, wealth, linage and honor. Hence, it has set methods to enable the achievement thereof. One of these methods is marriage. Whoever establish relation out of the marriage wedlock, he is wasting his life, health and wealth. Even if some discern some benefits of these illegal relations, it is just mirage. The Prophet, peace be upon him, said: "O youth! Whoever can afford it let him marry." I recommend Muslim youth to marry a righteous one as she helps to accomplish happiness in this life and in the life to come.
Name
Muslima
- Austria
Profession
Question
salam aleykom, please help me, is it allowed to get married with a muslim man who is married already and to have a"secret" marriage, he suggests to marry with 2 witnesses, to get mahr..but his first family can not know about...and he is willing to live with his 1th family most of the time..and to have to have a halal relations with me, jazaka allah kheer
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may ALlah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
No, this is not permissible since it is an obligation to announce marriage publiclly. Moreover, marriage is not only relations between a man and a woman but rather it is a relations between two families who will be uncles and aunts for the children.
Name
Shadin
- Sweden
Profession
Question
Does the Mahr have to be only one thing. What I mean is, can you ask for a few things? For example, if the bride wants the groom to teach her Qur'an, and to read some books that she would like him to read, that would be two things, does she only have to pick one for her Mahr? If so, can the other one be put as a condition in the marriage contract?
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
Mahr can be made of more than one thing provided what is requested is halal and is possible.
Name
Nadeen
- United Kingdom
Profession
Teacher
Question
As-Salam Alaykum!
My husband and I have been married for almost 5 years. We are married under that law of our country, but we never did an Islamic Nikah, or the Maher. I've been told that our marriage is valid, but we should still do the Maher. My questions are as follows:
1) Is it too late to do the Maher?
2) Is it to late to put conditions in the marriage contract? I was not aware that we can do this before. If you could specify what this means that would be great.
3)Is it too late to state conditions of divorce, and ask for the right of divorce?
Thank you in advance for your sincere answer!
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
Your marriage is correct and you are entitled to a mahr equal to that paid to women of your status. It is not late.
As for conditioning, you can if your husband agrees since marriage has been made according to the conditions stipulated at the time of contracting.
As for the right of divorce, you cannot stipulate it now. It is too late for this condition
Name
Khadeja veronic
- Bangladesh
Profession
Question
As-Salamu Alykum Sheikh Hussein,
I want to know how do you deal with the forced marriage cases? And how do you –a an Islamic Centre- act to prevent such a phenomena?
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
In Islam marriage should be based on acceptance from the bride and the bridegroom. A marriage contract based on force not valid. A woman complained to the prophet, Peace be upon him, against her father who got her married to someone without her consent. The prophet, peace be upon him, gave her the right to reject that marriage.
We, at the Islamic Centre, do not approve marriage until we hear acceptance from both sides.
Name
unknown
- United States
Profession
student
Question
Asalamuilikum
Sheikh what should I do? There is a lot of temptaion in the U.S. AND europe. I want to get married but I don't have the means. Sometimes I lose my mind. I know all the stuff that sheikhs say about lowering the gaze and stuff. I need something more than this. I am practising islam but it is so hard for me sometimes. That is why I sometimes commit haram act. Please give useful advice inshallah.
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
Look for a good Muslim family and marry a lady from them. She will help you to accomplish success in this life and in the Hereafter.
Name
Muhammad
- Bahrain
Profession
service
Question
watching of movies and lisning of songs/music in islam
Answer
Dear Brother,
we apologize for not answering this question, it is out of the live dialogue's scope.
Name
muslimah
- United States
Profession
Question
Assalamu Alaikum.
As 2nd and 3rd generation of Muslims (such as myself) begin to make up our Muslim communities, our individual cultural backgrounds has begun to mesh into a Muslim identity that embraces both our eastern roots and our western home. With this is the westernization of the way we meet potential spouses, and gender relations in general. Although it is clear to me that regardless of nationality or upbringing, the ways of the Prophet (pbuh) and the teaching of the Qur'an have transcended the times and the mass culture, are there times where there are slight exceptions based on the cultural upbringing? Some religious young muslims accept casual phone conversations, texting,emailing etc. as acceptable ways of getting to know a potential spouse- even if the intentions are intially unclear if for marriage, the parents don't know/aren't ok with it, etc.
This may seem like an simple question with an obvious answer; that the interaction between men and women, regardless of culture and times, must remain business only, or with clear intention of marriage. However, it is (for better or worse) a huge trend amongst practicing young muslims to end up in pseudo realtionships, often times beginning with harmless aqaintances and ending up with both parties emotionally dependent. Many argue that this sort of communication, even with out a clear intent of marriage, is not completely unlwaful, as in western societies, this is the best way we can find our soulmates/potential spouses. What is your opinion on this matter?
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
Any communications between members of opposite sex should have a reason and should be practiced according to the Islamic morals. Communications without a reason leads to haram things.
Communications based on finding a spouse should be founded on serious intention
Name
R.
-
Profession
Question
As'Salam Alaikum brother.
When one gets married, people usually say that the person you marry is your Nasib or Qadar.(I'm not fully sure of the difference between these two words) When you get a divorce, they say again to be patient because this is your Qadar from God. Is divorce something pre-destined by God, or is it by human fault? Is the person we marry also sent to us from God, or is it just human choice?
Is it correct to say that my wife or husband is my nasib?
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
Islam has set certain rules for choosing a spouse. Islam encourages Muslims to marry people with certain attributes e.g. righteousness to lead a happy life. If one applies these rules when choosing his/her spouse then this spouse is his/her qadar. If the couple have problems that make their life together impossible. So, after exhausting every possible means, if they resort to divorce, then divorce is also a qadar. Everything in this universe occurs on the basis of qadr. Nevertheless, one should apply the law of cause and effect since it is also part of the qadar.
Name
imran
- India
Profession
Question
assalaamualaikum..my name is imran and im staying in uk right now..the problem of mine is..my mother is not behaving good with me after i told her tht i cant repay the loan she and my step father took..and she always says bad thing abt my father who is no more alive..im married and because of financial problem im in the uk,,my wife is in her mother's house..cause my mum doesnt want her to stay there nor she is allowing me to come back to india..she says she wont let me and my wife inside the house,,my mum was realy nice before whn i was giving her money..she only wants money thts it,,no feelings nothing..and on the other hand my wife is also facing lots of problem in her house..she is always been insulted by her mum and always say her bad words..so she is also realy suffering..once i treid her visa but got refused..im realy getting mad from all this things..v both alhamdulillah pray our namaaz ..v recite quran pak as wel..and also been giving sadka..but wht alse v should do..thers no body to help accept allah pak..both our mum dont like us..but v love thm..wht should i do
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may ALlah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
Obey your wife within the limits that you can. Get united with your wife as long as your mother is not dependent on you.
Name
Muhammad Naveed
- Canada
Profession
Question
assalam o alaikum
what kind of marriage practices are mostly common among euro muslims and among those is there any which you think is outside the boundries/limits defined in our beautiful religion Islam.
Answer
Praise be to Allah and may Allah's peace, blessings and mercy be upon our prophet Muhammad and those who follow his guidance
Islam defines marriage and sets certain condiitons to meet. Any marriage meets these conditions is correct and if otherwise then otherwise. It is very difficult to mention the types of illegal mirraiges.
