“Muslims think Mohammad is higher than God” said Mr. Bird—my Christian Sunday School teacher. I can still remember looking at a photo of the Ka`bah and thinking how weird they would think like that. How can anyone think a human is higher than God? Those were the first words I ever heard about Islam when I was a little girl and this is where I say my journey to Islam began.

I was raised in a Christian home with loving, hardworking parents; my mom being the one who stressed the belief in a Creator. We attended a Methodist Church for a few years, sometimes I sat with her during the sermons or I would go to the basement for the youth classes. I don’t recall what was taught in the classes but I liked being with the teachers and other kids. Throughout my teenage I continued to believe in God but didn’t like church because the sermons were like history lessons with the general message to “be good”. I would read the Bible, special prayer and inspirational books at night. It was a comfort thing to keep God uppermost in my thoughts.

My time for God was best at home and not at church because I began to question so much. I remember clearly when the pastor was speaking about ‘Jesus as Lord’, this vision entered my head with Jesus standing in the front and ‘God’ standing way in the background. It was at this time I seriously questioned where does God stand in all this? Why do we pray and talk to Jesus? And which one is “Lord”? Jesus or God or both?! How is Jesus God and God Jesus? Was God looking at Himself when he saw Jesus? When Jesus prayed, did he pray to himself? When Jesus died, was it God dying? Confusing! I felt uncomfortable because I didn’t get it; as if something was wrong with me and my faith was weak. No one could explain the Concept of Trinity. The Original Sin thing annoyed me too. Why should I be held accountable for the actions of some guy thousands of years ago?!

Occasionally my Mom, sister and I attended different churches from Methodist to Baptist. I even attended an Apostolic Church for a short time with all the clapping, dancing, speaking in tongues, slain-in-the-spirit stuff. That really was too much after awhile. The services were more like a party than a respectful time to worship and learn about our Creator. All of it saddened me because I felt empty inside. All this showy exaggeration yet no one was praying to God.

It was in high school that I joined a group of fellow Christian teens. We went to church functions together and spoke to other kids about “Jesus as the Savior”. At one group meeting when the leader asked us to pray, I noticed that everyone was praying differently.

Just how are we suppose to pray I wondered? I didn’t recall the Bible ever telling us. I asked another student and he said basically I could make it up anyway I wanted. That bothered me. I thought if we are created to worship God surely God would instruct mankind How to do so. Eventually with all the above questions I drifted away from church while continuing to believe in and love God although still feeling guilty for not accepting what my religion taught. Here I was a Christian who rejected Christianity. I never doubted there is a Creator, the world is just too, too magnificent to say otherwise. It was the lack of direction in Christianity that made me leave.

A few years after high school I first met Muslim students. As an American my “knowledge” about Islam was far from accurate. I knew so little and much of it negative from what the media and Hollywood movies spun at that time. I found these Muslims fascinating. The first thing I noticed was their strength in belief in God, and they weren’t afraid to say they believed in God. Even their maturity towards responsibility was different; they seemed more mature than others in their twenties. Mind you I know that not all Muslims are great examples of Islam; I was richly blessed to have met decent ones from the start. I was impressed too that these young people were so devoted to their families.

The first Muslim female I met was sister Janan. I can still picture seeing her the day she came to UW-Milwaukee wearing the hijab, and asking her why she started wearing it. It was because of Islam and to please God she said. Cool. Someone who loves God so much and wasn’t afraid of what people thought about her modest covering. (To this day I greatly respect all Muslimahs who dress and act with dignity and wear the headscarf—this shows a deep love and strength to please Allah regardless of what other people think).

Next was Estelle, a young woman who converted to Islam. We started talking about Islam and got on the topic about Prophet Muhammad. Just like a water dam opening, those words “Muslims think Mohammad is higher than God” flowed out of my deep memories. I mentioned to her what my Sunday School teacher told me, she giggled politely and told me this was untrue. How intriguing. I felt as if a spark was ignited in me! Just what is this religion? Most of what I knew was wrong. Every thing I saw was pure and good. From the Muslims I met and how they acted I sensed this religion could not be the negative the media continuously portrayed. I liked their phrases of “subhan Allah” (Glory be to Allah), “al-humdu lillah” (praise to Allah), “in sha' Allah” (if Allah wills). “as-salamu `alaykum” (peace be with you). What an exceptional way to greet each other. All these expressions, it was as if they were thinking about God all day long just in their conversations alone.

My journey sped faster…

A student who would later become my husband gave me a few books on Islam to read because I mentioned I was interested in studying. There was “Islam Day” at the university and I was able to gain more information about this “strange” religion. I say this word because growing up in western culture, it was odd to see people "living" their religion throughout the day. Although I was interested, it came with an attitude. I wanted to prove Islam was “nice” but not the truth. I discovered that there were similarities between Christianity and Islam. They call the Creator “Allah” which is simply “God” in another language. Why did I think “God” in English was only correct? From what I read too, Allah is incredibly merciful, and not so stern as some non-Muslims claimed. Every single book I could get my hands on about comparative religion, I immediately flipped ahead to the chapter on Jesus (peace be upon him). This is the core issue Christianity is based on and the one that differs much between Christians and Muslims. What I found was that Islam gives superior respect to this man and does not compromise his purpose by claiming he is God or the Son of God. I felt angry. Who are these people to say Jesus is not the Son of God?! At first I wanted to ditch Islam but to be fair to myself and my soul, I had to study so I could make a sound, objective decision. I agreed that as an adult it’s now my responsibility to investigate my childhood beliefs; my parents meant well but that does not mean they taught me the truth. And since I professed belief in a Creator, I was obligated to learn about Him and what’s required of me. So I continued. What a blessing.

Popular people like Pat Robertson (700 Club) routinely spoke negatively about Islam. Instead of him blaming individuals, it was easier to blame the religion that actually keeps the vast majority of Muslims peaceful. When I discovered much of what he said to be false, this peaked my curiosity even more to go to Muslim sources to learn. Gradually I discovered Islam as magnificent in that it answered all the questions I had about monotheism, the purpose of our existence, how to worship, how to live, why we should live piously, the Day of Judgment, and Jesus. And to my surprise all the prophets I had read or heard about in Christianity starting with Adam were right there in the Qur'an, highly respected. I was amazed at the connection of each of these great men in the line of prophets. They submitted to God, the exact meaning of being Muslim. And to my surprise the Qur'an has an entire chapter (Maryam 19) on Mary, the mother of Jesus, giving the highest regard to her. Whereas Protestant Christianity rarely mentions her.

A short time after beginning my research I had to pull back though. I felt scared; my entire belief system was crumbling. I had to check my prejudices too thinking that Islam couldn’t be right because “it wasn’t western”. (Ethnocentric to say the least). For the first time I had to honestly and objectively took a hard look at the origins of Christianity. I studied material from various scholars like the late Brother Ahmad Deedat, famous scholar in comparative religion. His sources were only the Bible and history. Verses from the Old and New Testaments testifying to the advent of Prophet Muhammad left me in awe. No one else could honestly fit those prophecies more so than this man Muhammad. If I accepted Islam as truth, why not its Messenger?!

One day I opened the New Testament with the thought to remember ‘Jesus is a prophet’. This made a remarkable difference. All those verses about him fell into place. He is a beloved prophet, created miraculously, a sincere servant of God, did nothing of his own will except what God permitted him, never claimed to be a son, and will return again. Also he spoke of the coming of Prophet Muhammad (John Chapter 16).

To be fair I looked at other religions. I did so with this criteria: strict monotheism and acceptance of all the prophets. Buddhism, Hinduism and others similar were crossed out right away. Judaism, being strict with monotheism, denies both Prophets Jesus and Muhammad. Christianity, I painfully realized is not a monotheistic religion because of the Trinity, and it denies the final prophet. The more I researched Christianity, the more I kept going back to Islam. The only religion that consistently stood alone was Islam. I give Allah credit for this thought that finally pushed me to become Muslim. He did not give mankind different religions to confuse us. All the guidance sent to various communities was actually Islam, in portions. People took those portions and named them Judaism or Christianity or whatever. It was not until the final prophet, Prophet Muhammad, that Allah’s Guidance was completed. It was Allah who called it Islam (complete submission to the Will of Allah).

I said the shahadah [editor's note: shahadah means testimony of Faith] with Allah as my witness. I distinctly remember days later the sun looked brighter, my senses were stronger, the trees looked more colorful, the entire world looked different. It was like I was brand new person. My purpose of why I exist became crystal clear. The first time I prayed, reading off a paper where I phonetically wrote the Arabic, I wept like a baby! Finally I was praying and pleasing my Creator the way He obliges us to. Instant comfort. Instant peace.

My family was not too pleased as they felt I was going against them, but al-humdu lillah they see how clean and content my life is. In sha' Allah I pray Allah will guide them to be Muslims before they die. When I began to wear a scarf I did feel anxious every time I would see family and friends who didn’t know I reverted to Islam, but I would whisper to myself “Fear the Creator, not the created”; “I do this to please you Allah”, and my nervousness would vanish. How merciful Allah is in that these same words keep my faith strong to this day.

I apologize for this being so long. No one can write about this great endeavor in just a few phrases. I’ve been a practicing Muslim for about 13 years actually I can’t give a specific time because as I was learning Islam, I was slowly living like a Muslim well before I said the shahadah. For those who are born into a Muslim family, in sha' Allah perhaps you will see that embracing Islam and turning your entire life in another direction is not a small thing. It’s a grand struggle however the journey is worth taking, subhan Allah. What a blessing to be lead to Islam. There is a power in it hard to describe; an unmatchable gift to be cherished until our last breathe. Instead of us existing aimlessly, we are blessed with a pure Guidance to keep us disciplined and free from misery. Thousands and thousands of people around the world are reverting back to Islam every single year; how exciting to learn Islam is entering the hearts of so many.

I humbly give all credit to Allah for this and seek His forgiveness for my weaknesses. With sincere conviction I accept the obligation to strive to be the best example of Islam to please Allah and to prove to Allah my soul is worthy of Jannah [editor's note: jannah means Paradise].