What
has become of my people after so many testing events?
As
the car drove into the Iraqi borders and we departed the
Jordanian sands, I felt many lumps passing through my throat and
into my aching stomach. Has trauma changed them into people that
I no longer know or understand?
After
ten hours of waiting, we finally arrived. As I kissed and hugged
family members who I missed badly, I looked into their eyes and
felt the same warmth and embrace in their welcoming looks. I was
home. It was such a relief. They were unchanged and safe. While
I needed so badly to convince myself of this, due to my lack of
readiness to deal with what had happened, they were indeed
changed, and much more unsafe.
A
couple of days after arriving, the stories began to trickle.
Torture stories—of my aunt’s husband, my father’s cousins,
and many like them. Stories of torture, rape, murder, and theft
were told. I absorbed each and every story I heard, because that
was the least I felt I could do for my family that was in so
much pain.
My
breaths became harder to take because of the weight that fell
upon my heart. What was I to do with a cousin’s tears as she
voiced to me her fear of going to work and getting raped on the
way? At times I felt that I could not absorb one more tear or
story; my heart was full and it spilled over several times. I
knew that I could not soak up all the pain for them, but I did
not know what I could do.
I
slowly came to realize that taking in the horrible events that
Iraqis are susceptible to cannot and will not empower them or
me. While shooting, bombing, rape, torture, theft, and murder
are horrifying injustices, I cannot stop the injustices; they
are too big and numerous. I cannot bandage their pain by
torturing myself with the agony and helplessness of the stories.
It would be an injustice to focus only on those events and
ignore the endurance and courage of the Iraqi people.
They
asked me to tell you to make du`aa' for them. |
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I
constantly asked, “How do you manage?” I constantly and
consistently received one answer. They would point their finger
up into the sky and proclaim with a conviction as sure as the
dry heat of the Iraqi sun, “Allah!” It is one thing to
believe in Allah and beg His help in trying times, but it is
another to live by a belief in His presence and protection. Even
little children memorized versus from the Quran in order to
protect them through the day. They consider this to be a test of
their endurance and faith, and they want to grow from this
horrible experience because the alternative is to crumble.
I
was surprised by how many times the Palestinian plight was
mentioned. The Iraqis I encountered always reminded me of how
many years the Palestinians have been suffering. A cousin told
me that when bombs fall near her home she looks up at the
ceiling of her home and thanks Allah that she still has a home;
and she makes du`aa' (supplication) for Palestinians who
have lost their homes. I was immediately reminded of the hadith,
“You see the believers as regards their being merciful among
themselves, and showing love among themselves and being kind,
resembling one body, so that, if any part of the body is not
well then the whole body shares the sleeplessness [insomnia] and
fever with it” (Al-Bukhari). I asked them what they would like
their Muslim brothers and sisters to do for them—how we could
help.
I
was surprised by how many times the Palestinian plight was
mentioned. |
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As
I departed my homeland, I wondered what it would mean for me to
become one with my Iraqi brothers and sisters so that I could
come to their aid as a body comes to the aid of its parts.
It
is easy to become frustrated by these situations and feel
depressed, but in order to evoke such a united bodily response
we cannot be depressed and negativistic; being so undermines the
endurance and emotional struggle that Iraqi men and women
undergo. Becoming negative and depressed makes us convince
ourselves that there is nothing we can do and, therefore, we
must detach.
I
wonder what it would do if we did not become hopeless and weak,
and we, instead, committed to offering a weekly day of Qiyam
Al-Layl (Night Vigil Prayer) in our local mosques for Muslim
brothers and sisters suffering around the world.
How
powerful it is to have brothers and sisters uniting to offer du`aa'
in the midst of their nights for suffering, sleepless men, women
and children oceans away! How powerful it is to teach our
children how to manage their frustrations by lending their heart
to Allah Most High in prayer and du`aa'!
How
powerful it would be if these words could offer a glimmer of
hope to you, dear reader, and help you to enhance your
relationship with Allah Most High and to become one with other
Muslim men and women in the world!
How
powerful it would be if these were not just words! How powerful!