|
|
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
Last Update: 15:45 GMT, Thu., July 31, 2008 / Rajab 28, 1429
|
|
|
|
|
|
Cultivating an Inner Life for Ourselves,
Our Children, and Our World
|
|
By
By Abdul-Lateef Abdullah** |
Mar.
6, 2006 |
|
"The individual who is not anchored in
God can offer no resistance on his own resources
to the physical and moral blandishments of the
world."
(C.G.
Jung)
In
a recent job interview I was asked by one of the
panelists what I thought was wrong with the youth
in Malaysia. I responded flatly that I thought we
(adults) were actually the problem with the youth.
The five interviewers stared back at me in
disbelief. I added that I thought our young
people, through their behavior, were merely
responding to the world we had "created"
for them.
If
we look at the society we have built as adults,
our values, how we conduct ourselves and the
example we collectively set, is it any wonder that
the youth are acting (and reacting) the way they
are to what is happening around them? Simply put,
children and youth are our mirrors: They reflect
our hypocrisy and show it to us through their
words and actions. Therefore,
if we want to change young people, we need to
change ourselves first.
[Allah
does not change the condition of a people until
they change their own condition.]
(Ar-Ra`d 13:11)
A
New Pair of Eyes
The
growing popularity of self-help, do-it-yourself
spirituality, and religious conversion are
evidence that many people around the globe are
seeking personal transformation. Transformation is
not merely change, but rather a shift in
assumptions, beliefs, and perspective, the end
result being a revolution in how we arrive at
having meaning in our lives. The result of
transformative learning, the process that
facilitates transformation, is perspective
transformation.
Perspective
transformation is the process of becoming
critically aware of how and why our
assumptions have come to constrain the way
we perceive, understand, and feel about the
world; changing these structures of habitual
expectation to make possible a more
inclusive, discriminating, and integrating
perspective; and, finally, making choices or
otherwise acting upon these new
understandings. (Imel)
Accordingly,
to undergo personal transformation, we must become
critically aware of our own assumptions and
understand how and why these assumptions and
relationships with our loved ones.
Any
sincere revert to Islam who reads the above quote
about perspective transformation will probably
identify with it right away. Religious conversion
is often accompanied by perspective
transformation, whereby our previous assumptions
about "ultimate concerns" — such as
God, life, existence, why am I here?— are
challenged by a new paradigm, a new way of
understanding the world and our place in it. Even
today, everyday events that were once relegated to
the mundane are given new meaning. Those who
undergo this deep process of transformation do so
as if they were reborn and consequently see the
world with a new pair of eyes.
Identities
The
inner peace that often results from this
transformational process is the product of a
complete uncovering of the self. It is as if the
individual is turned inside out and all of the
fundamental assumptions, beliefs, judgments, and
ideas were brought into the light and examined,
discarded, refined, or embraced with a greater
level of understanding.
It
is often a deep, painstaking, and difficult
experience, but one that represents nothing less
than the arrival of the self at Truth and the
answering of its call to live a life in it. This
process also entails the "inner work,"
of going inside one's heart and mind by way of
solitude, remembrance, deep contemplation, and
heartfelt prayer.
It
is from that process that realization can occur,
in those moments when we realize the limitations
of everything, including ourselves. Many reverts
to Islam speak of a point where they attain such a
state of "poverty," of having absolutely
no answers and feeling complete helplessness, that
they can do nothing else but fall on their faces
in prostration. It is not a state of desperation
or hopelessness, however, but the result of an
overwhelming conviction that only Allah can be
relied upon and turned to for assistance.
The
confusion about my supposed identity as a
Muslim and coming from a multicultural
background (Punjabi, Bidayuh [native
Sarawakian], Chinese, and Japanese), trying to
fit in among my friends made me feel restless,
because I did not know who I was, I was not
sure about my purpose in life. Conversations
with friends were futile; everyone was just
too busy having fun — music, shopping,
drinking, parties, etc. Though I was
surrounded with many friends and I was active
in high school, I have never felt more alone
or restless.
I
had seen pictures of "sujud" in the How
to Pray book that my Islamic teacher got
for us and one night, in a state of despair, I
simply crouched to the floor, the way I had
seen it done in the prayer book. The feeling
brought me much peace and I felt comforted. I
would often perform this late at night,
falling to my knees and prostrating in the
privacy of my room asking Allah to
"please help me." I believe that
moment like these, moments when I had listened
to the Adhan as a child were ways of Allah
telling me that He was there for me — Nina.
The
process of purification is the essence of Islam and
requires a deep examination of ourselves to identify
our assumptions and beliefs. Anything that has power
over us, whether consciously or subconsciously, must
be identified and dealt with for us to fully realize
that there is only One God. The stripping away of
all idols and attachment to things that hold power
over us removes barriers within the self. Removing
these inner boundaries means that we are better
placed to have healthier relationships with our
selves and our loved ones.
If
the individual is not truly regenerated in
spirit, society cannot be either, for society is
the sum total of individuals in need of
redemption. (Jung)
If
this is so, then what are the ramifications of not
doing our inner work of purification, shining a
light on those "inner demons" and
uncovering the Truth within us so that we may be
better servants of the Divine Unity? We must have
the courage to examine ourselves, our culture, and
our society and what has been passed down to us.
Clearly, the result of not doing this inner work is
what we see when we look in the mirror and at the
troubled faces of our brothers and sisters,
culminating in what is happening with our societies,
families, and children.
Despite
the masks and costumes we wear to display our
outward piety, inside we are a mess. We have not yet
realized our inner Truth because we refuse to
"go there" and face ourselves. Yet, it is
so easy for so many of us to shine the light on
others' apparent hypocrisies and flaws, but when it
comes to our own selves, it is a much different
story.
This
inner truth of ours, or lack thereof, is what
dictates how we interact with the world and what we
project as our "image." And it is this
lack of inner truth manifested through our
relationships that our children, in particular,
often pick up on. Children are capable of seeing
through all of our nonsense. Thus, their behavior
that we often find detestable is arguably nothing
more than a reflection and reaction to our own lack
of inner Truth.
Whether
or not we "put on a happy face" or act
like "good Muslims" every day for our
children and others does not matter. Much of what
our children will become is influenced by our own
inner state. Our refusal to admit that we need to
admit that we need ongoing self-transformation and a
dedicated inner life is done at our own peril and
that of our future generations. When humanity
collectively refuses to go inside itself
(individually and collectively), hell on earth is
unleashed.
For
too many people, a large number of whom are Muslims,
this hell is an everyday reality. There is an
obvious relationship between the worsening state of
human relations and overall health of our global
society and the virtual abandonment of the
"inner" teachings of Islam and other major
world religions. As much as we try to do so, our
outward persona cannot hide our true inner state,
not even from our children.
Sources
Jung,
C.G. The Undiscovered Self. London: Routledge
& Kegan Paul: 1958
Imel,
Susan. "Transformative Learning in
Adulthood." ERIC Digest 200. ERIC
Clearinghouse on Adult Career and Vocational
Education: Columbus, Ohio, 1998.
Read
Also:
Join Discussion Forums
:
**
Abdul-Lateef Abdulla is an American convert
to Islam. He holds a bachelor's in political science
and economics from the University of Delaware, a
master's in social work from Columbia University,
and recently earned a doctorate from the Institute
for Community & Peace Studies, Universiti Putra
Malaysia, in the field of youth studies. He has
worked as a Program Assistant for the Academy for
Educational Development (Washington, DC); and with
the Taqwa Gayong Academy (New Jersey, USA and
Penang, Malaysia) for troubled youth, both Muslim
and non-Muslim.
|
|
|
|
|
|
