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52 Ways To Make A Difference
by Amina Cisse Muhammad
Islam Online, Washington, DC
30/01/2001
In this weekly column, we feature a discussion of a “small way” that each of us, as Muslims and as human beings, can seek to contribute to our families, our communities, our societies; indeed, Insha’Allah, to the world.
We urge you to take a moment to reflect on these words, and to contemplate how you might put them into action in your own life to benefit humanity. May Allah bless each and every one of us!
Week 4
It is easy, in the preoccupation with the hustle and bustle of our day-to-day lives, to become involved in simple misunderstandings with others that, if not properly mended, can lead to broken relationships – quite often with people we care for deeply.
In many cases, a simple apology from one of the parties would easily fix things; however, as humans, we usually don’t find “I’m sorry” two words that are easy to say. Instead, we wait for the other person (whom we have branded as “wrong”) to take the first step towards reconciliation.
The thing is that while we are waiting for them to take the initiative, we are losing out on valuable time that cannot be replaced. SINCE TOMORROW IS NOT PROMISED ANY OF US, AND SO MANY PEOPLE GO TO THEIR GRAVES UNFORGIVING AND UNFORGIVEN, LEARN TO SAY I’M SORRY (AND MEAN IT) BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!
Insha’Allah, don’t be one of those unfortunate souls who are contemplating, as they lie in their deathbed, the many things they wish they had done differently, or the many people they wish they had treated differently.
As Muslims, we know that we should seek Allah’s forgiveness often. In Sura’tul Al-I-Imran (3:133), Allah says, “And hasten to forgiveness from your Lord.”
And granting forgiveness to others is important as well; we are instructed to forgive others so that Allah may forgive us (Sura’tul Nur, Ayat 22): … let them forgive and overlook: do you not wish that Allah should forgive you? For Allah is Oft-Forgiving Most Merciful.”
We are also instructed to do our best to facilitate reconciliation between estranged or differing parties (Sura’tul Hujurat, Ayat 9): “If two parties among the Believers fall into a quarrel, make ye peace between them.” It follows that offering an apology to someone with whom we are estranged, or with whom we are having differences, and asking them to forgive us is, Insha’Allah, commendable.
So think of someone that you are not getting along with so well right now… a family member, a long-lost friend, a co-worker and go say, “I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?” Even if you really believe that they are at fault.
Go ahead, before you get cold feet.
The words “I’m sorry,” simple though they may be, have prevented many a fight, salvaged many a relationship… even helped to avoid many a lawsuit. They have a kind of magic in them that is “not bad for two simple words.” (52 Ways To Make A Difference, Giftworks from Chronicle Books).
In conclusion, “It is a great heart that can confess mistakes” (Al Hajj Maulana Fazlul Karim, English Translation and Commentary of Mishkat-ul-Masabih, p. 547).
#4: Learn to say I’m sorry and to ask for forgiveness.
#3: Visualize the “ideal Islamic community.” Now, determine what role Allah has gifted you to play in it.
#2: Take a moment to self-reflect: are you passive, reactive, or proactive?
#1: Consider that, indeed, you can make a difference!
Note: This list is being developed partially from the card set, “52 Ways to Make A Difference,” published by Chronicle Books and available at Borders Book Store in the mini-book section.
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