Some Advice for Families in the Last Days of Ramadan

It is one of Allah’s blessings to the Muslim that He enables him to fast in the daytime of Ramadan and spend the night in Prayer. It is a month in which good deeds are multiplied and people are raised in status, and when Allah frees some of His servants from Hellfire. So the Muslim should strive to make the most of this month to attain the goodness it brings; he should hasten to worship Allah night and day. Such great blessings of Allah are obvious in considering people who have been deprived of tasting the sweetness of this month because of sickness, death, or misguidance! The Muslim must make use of this blessed month to get his children accustomed to the ethics and morals of fasting. A child usually grows up in the manner in which the parents make him or her accustomed. We can offer parents the following advice:

-Check on the children’s fasting and encourage those who fall short in this regard.

-Remind them about the real nature of fasting, and that it is not just giving up food and drink, but it is a means of attaining taqwa (piety), and that it is an opportunity for sins to be forgiven and expiated.

- Teach them the manners and rulings of eating, such as eating with the right hand from what is directly in front of them, reminding them that extravagance is haram (unlawful) and harmful to the body.

- Don’t let them spend too long on eating iftar so that they don’t miss performing Maghrib Prayer in congregation.

- Remind them about the situation of the poor and destitute who cannot find even a mouthful of food to satisfy their hunger. Remind them of the situation of those who have migrated or are fighting in jihad for the sake of Allah in all places.

- Use these gatherings to bring relatives together and uphold the ties of kinship. This custom still exists in some countries, and it is an opportunity to reconcile and mend broken ties between relatives.

- Work together as a family to prepare the food and to clean up and put away the leftovers.

- Remind the children to perform Tarawih Prayer and to prepare for it by not eating too much and to get ready in time to perform the Prayer in the mosque, (if a mosque is nearby. If you do not live close to a mosque, perform Tarawih Prayer together as a family and try to take them to a mosque for Tarawih Prayers at least on the weekends.)

- Remind the children of the blessing of suhur (pre-dawn meal) and that it gives a person the strength to fast.

- Remind the children of the virtue of the time before Fajr Prayer for those who have not prayed Witr to pray it then and to make a lot of du`aa’.

- If you live close enough to a mosque, perform Fajr Prayer in congregation in the mosque. If you live far away, perform Fajr at home after eating suhur, before sleeping again. Many people wake up at the end of the night to eat, then they go back to bed and neglect Fajr Prayer.

- It was the practice of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) in the last ten days of Ramadan to stay up at night and wake his family. This indicates that the family should pay attention to making the most of this blessed time in doing things that are pleasing to Allah. So the husband should wake his wife and children to do what will bring them closer to their Lord.

- Encourage the young children in the house to observe fasting; urge your little kids to get up for suhur, praise them and reward them for the days they fast.

- The husband should not overburden his wife by asking her to prepare food and sweets. Many people go to extremes in this month to prepare fancy foods and drinks. This detracts from the sweetness of this month and goes against the reason for fasting, which is to attain piety.

- Read the Qur’an together as a family. Parents should teach the children how to recite Qur’an and help them to understand the meanings of the verses.

- Encourage the children to spend on the needy and to offer any assistance to neighbors.

It was narrated that Ibn `Abbas said: The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) was the most generous of people, and he was at his most generous during Ramadan when Jibreel met him. He would meet him each night and revise the Qur’an with him. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) was more generous than the blowing wind. (Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

- Prevent your children from staying up late at night and wasting their time in things that are of no benefit, let alone haram things.

-Remember the family’s gathering in Allah’s Paradise in the Hereafter, and the great joy of meeting there under the shade of His throne.

- If possible, the parents should take the family for `Umrah in Ramadan, for that will benefit them all in the Hereafter. `Umrah during Ramadan has the same reward as Hajj.

May Allah Most High grant us all a blessed Ramadan.