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Traditions
of Marriage
Three
Days of a Traditional Indian Muslim Wedding
Pre-wedding
rituals
* Mehndi Ceremony
The mehndi (henna) ceremony is
held at the home of the bride on the eve of the wedding ceremony or a
couple of days before it. The female relatives of the girl anoint her
with turmeric paste to bring out the glow in her complexion. A relative
or a mehndiwali applies mehndi on the hands and feet of
the bride. The bride wears sober clothes. According to custom, she must
not step out of the house for the next few days until her marriage. The
bride’s cousins sometimes apply a dot of mehndi on the palm of
the groom.
Welcoming the Baraat
The groom arrives at the wedding venue
with his baraat (procession). A band of musicians strike up some
traditional notes to announce their arrival. The groom shares a drink of
sherbet with the bride’s brother. The bride’s sisters play pranks
and slap the guests playfully with batons made of flowers.
Nikah
The nikah or wedding ceremony
can be conducted at the home of the bride or the groom, or at any other
convenient venue. A maulvi (cleric) conducts the ceremony in the
presence of close family members and relatives. In orthodox Muslim
communities, the men and women are seated separately. The walis
(the father of the bride and of the bridegroom) play an important role
in the ceremony. The maulvi reads selected verses from the
Qur’an and the nikah is complete after the ijab-e-qubul
(proposal and acceptance). The boy’s side proposes and the girl’s
side conveys her assent. The mutual consent of the bride and groom is of
great importance for the marriage to be legal. On the day of the Nikah,
the elder members of the two families decide the amount of mahr
(dower). The mahr is a compulsory amount of money given by the
groom’s family to the bride.
Nikaahnama
The nikaahnaama is a document in
which the marriage contract is registered. It contains a set of terms
and conditions that must be respected by both the parties. It also gives
the bride the right to divorce her husband. For the contract to be
legal, it must be signed by the bridegroom, the bride, the walis,
and the maulvi.
Blessing the Groom
The groom receives blessings from the
older women and offers them his salam. The guests pray for the
newly-weds.
* Dinner, Prayers and Aarsimashaf
Dinner is a lavish spread. Usually, the
women and the men dine separately. After dinner, the newly-weds sit
together for the first time. Their heads are covered by a dupatta
while they read prayers under the direction of the maulvi. The
Qur’an is placed between the couple and they are allowed to see each
only through mirrors.
Post-wedding rituals
* Rukshat
The bride’s family bids her a tearful
farewell before she departs for her husband’s house. The bride’s
father gives her hand to her husband and tells him to protect and take
good care of her.
* Welcoming the Bride
The groom’s mother holds the Qur’an
above the head of her new daughter-in-law as she enters her new home for
the first time after the wedding.
* Chauthi
The Chauthi is the fourth day
after the wedding, when the bride visits the home of her parents. She
receives a joyous welcome on this day.
* Valimah
The valimah is the lavish
reception that the groom’s family hosts after the nikah. It is
a joyous occasion that brings together the two families, their
relatives, and other well-wishers.
* Source: www.zawaj.com
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